Living with a toddler
can often be exhilarating, exhausting and emotional
and sometimes all at the same time!
Every toddler is of course different but if yours
is particularly active and spirited, then you have
an additional challenge.
Keep him in the picture
Although toddlers are starting to understand what
you say to them, they become anxious when they don’t
know what’s coming next so one of the best ways
to diffuse potential problems is to let them know
what lies ahead. He will understand more than you
think
Be consistent and firm
Try to stick to the same routine and he will be more
accepting. If he gets away with something one time,
he will try to get away with it every time so you
have to be firm.
Avoid bargaining
If your toddler starts a temper tantrum, try to avoid
bargaining. So don’t offer to give him something
if he stops the tantrum. Be firm.
Your toddler has feelings too
But he cannot always express them. This may be when
he resorts to temper tantrums.
Those temper tantrums
If you toddler has a temper tantrum then leave the
room as he will soon stop if there is no one there
to witness the tantrum.
Watch out for tantrum triggers
You will learn to know what triggers a tantrum such
as boredom, frustration or even hunger. Be around
so that you can step in before he even reaches the
stage of throwing a tantrum. There may even be facial
expressions or body language which could alert you
to the onset of a tantrum.
Keep up the hugs and cuddles
Even though he is growing up fast, your toddler still
likes to be babied from time to time. Take time to
cuddle him, to play with him and to listen to him.
Channeling frustration
Your toddler may well have an emotional outburst
when he is frustrated. You can help him with support
and comfort while offering to show him how something
is done.
Create a positive rather than a negative
environment
And that means having a home that is child friendly
with toys and activities at his level and if possible
access to somewhere he can run and jump and shout.
If he has plenty to do and explore, he is less likely
to want to those things that belong to other members
of the family.
Predict trouble ahead
If you know a particular place or activity is going
to make your toddler very excitable, try to avoid
it in the first place.
Choose soothing activities
Sometimes you need to help your toddler to wind down
especially when you can see that he is starting to
get very boisterous. Find an activity that involves
water or other activities that have a calming effect
such as finger painting, play dough or sand.
Reward good behavior but don’t punish
bad behavior
When your toddler gets praise and attention for the
good things he does, he is less likely to do the naughty
things especially if you manage to ignore them.
Don’t expect the impossible
Give your toddler time to do all the things which
need to be achieved every day – he is not an
adult and cannot be expected to keep up with your
pace. He needs extra time to cope with change and
too may people and too much noise may well overwhelm
him. You need to make allowances for this.
Be careful not to label
Always use positive labels when discussing your toddler
with others and they will see him in a positive light
too! Focusing on your child’s positive traits
will change how you think and how your toddler behaves.
Don’t let meals become a battlefield
Toddlers have a natural ability to sense when they
are hungry and when they are full so if you insist
on something being finished, you are actually overriding
this natural ability – even leading to future
eating disorders and weight problems. Toddlers have
small stomachs so everything your toddler eats should
count towards his daily nutritional requirement. A
good routine to follow is to offer breakfast, lunch
and supper with a healthy snack mid morning and another
mid afternoon.
Your toddler needs to run free
Exposing your toddler to the fun of exercise sets
him up for a life of enjoying physical exercise. Apart
from the health benefits, he will use up lots of his
energy in the best possible way.
Encouraging independence
You will be promoting your toddler’s growing
independence if you ensure he can explore and experiment
in safe surroundings and if you allow him to make
simple choices whenever the opportunity arises.
You are important too
Many mothers find the toddler years to be more tiring
than a new baby. So make sure that you are eating
and drinking healthily, getting sufficient sleep and
rest and having some time just for yourself. If someone
offers to look after your toddler for an hour or two
to give you a break, then make sure you agree.
Take advantage of a support system
If friends and family are around, let them help you
give your toddler plenty of new experiences. Outside
of the home, play groups and classes and activities
will all give you a bit of a break and provide extra
stimulation and interest for your toddler.
You have a great adult in the making
Your toddler is like a sponge – everything
you put in will be retained and squeezed out again
at a later date! There are no guarantees of course
but you have the chance to do your very best to produce
a wonderful adult in years to come. Don’t let
him down.
