If you have a new baby in the house, you don’t
need to be told how much time and energy it takes
to care for your baby and to keep to some sort of
routine. If you have an older child or children in
the house, then everything becomes even more difficult.
Suddenly every member of the family needs more attention
than ever. The health and wellbeing of you the mom
goes right down to the bottom of the list. You need
to try and avoid this happening.
As the mainstay of the family, your health and wellbeing
should actually be at the top of the list:
o With a bit of luck, you will have had the time
and energy to organize your home, freeze some home
cooked meals and had your chores fairly up to date
before the birth of your baby.
o If friends and family want to come and visit then
- first you need to space out such visits and - secondly
you need to rope them in to help. And don’t
be shy to suggest ways in which they can do this:
such as preparing a meal, doing shopping or chores
for you or looking after any other children. Make
it clear that you are recovering from childbirth and
that you could do with all the help you can get. Nine
times out of ten they will only be too willing to
lend a hand. If you can drop hints about all this
to family and friends even before your baby is born,
then do so. It will avoid any problems later on.
o Remember that successful breastfeeding depends
on the mom avoiding exhaustion. As your new baby is
sensitive to your moods, any tiredness, or the feeling
you are unable to cope, will inevitable cause your
baby to suffer. You need to be very clear about your
needs which are particularly important at this time.
o If your mother or mother-in-law or another close
friend or relative offers to come and stay for a while,
then gratefully accept such an offer. This will definitely
ease the pressure off you and will help you get used
to having the baby as part of your routine.
o Try to take breaks from taking care of the baby
as and when you can. Never feel guilty about such
a break as it is necessary for your mental and physical
well being.
o Make sure you eat regularly and well and that you
include fresh fruits and green vegetables.
o Keep meals simple or use prep-prepared foods to
cut down on the time and energy spent cooking.
o Your night’s sleep is inevitably going to
be disturbed in those early days (if not longer!).
Having a sleep whenever your baby sleeps is going
to help you keep going. When your baby is restless,
use the time to put him in a sling so that you can
do other essential chores around the home.
o Even if your partner is working, you can still
enlist his help in sharing some of the baby care.
Fathers these days are often much more “hands
on” and relaxed about looking after babies than
earlier generations. Make the most of this new found
talent! Try to work out a timetable so that there
is some time during the day or night when the baby
becomes his responsibility, giving you some precious
time to yourself for example to soak in the bath.
Make sure Dad’s time is long enough to make
you feel that you are having a break but not so long
that Dad feels abandoned.
o Many babies are comforted by the sound of running
water and will sit peacefully in an infant seat on
the floor of the bathroom while you or your partner
are having a shower or bath. You can chat to your
baby at the same time too.
o Sometimes you can trade childcare with another
new mom from your neighborhood so that one of you
takes care of both babies for an hour or two while
the other mom has a break. Then next time, swap it
around.
o You need to create “couple time” too
when it is just the two of you. Work out the things
which you can still do even with a new baby around.
Keep the lines of communication open so that you can
discuss any minor issues before they become major
problems. Try to make the talk sessions meaningful
without them turning into complaining sessions as
that won’t help either of you. And treat yourself
to a babysitter so that you can have some time out
together – even if it is just an hour or two.
With a little bit of luck and a lot of help, you
can make those early weeks with your new born baby
a little easier so that you the mom do not suffer.
But don’t forget to seek medical help and advice
if you are concerned about either your physical or
mental health in any way.
Sometimes the “baby blues” can creep
up on you so if you experience symptoms of depression
after giving birth and you feel there is something
wrong, tell someone close to you so they can get help
and treatment for your from your midwife or doctor.
Don’t just leave it. Having a baby is a time
of great change so that new mothers experience biological,
physical, emotional and social changes. So it is really
not all that surprising that about 70% of women will
experience an emotional let down (however slight)
after giving birth.
